Night of the Mooncalf
by PartlyFoxyPartlyGrandma
Summary: Hermione returns home after a long trip around the world, but what is on the mind of one certain Potions master? Set many years after Hermione's seventh year. SS/HG.


Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all related indicia are the trademarks of J.K. Rowling and Warner Bros. None of this story has been produced in the hopes of a moneymaking scheme….  
  
Summary: Hermione returns home after a long trip around the world, but what is on the mind of one certain Potions master?  
  
A/N: This took me a long time to write. As you can see, I'm quite slow. Just be warned-I wrote part of it while reading Ray Bradbury's "Fahrenheit 451". Watch out for long descriptions with many metaphors….  
  
The Golden Goblet was a quaint little Muggle restaurant that was run by a well-known wizarding family. Of course, the Muggles didn't know this because the Potters kept things almost completely free of any sort of magic. Sometimes the wine needed a little nudging in the aging process, or food accidentally was burnt and needed mending, but even then those incidents were petty.  
  
Muggles and wizarding folk alike came to eat here, and no one got suspicious- except for the fact that unruly wizards or witches got a little out of hand sometimes. Then the use of a Memory Charm was in order.  
  
All in all, Ginny loved her work. Her husband, Harry, had finally given in a few years ago to let her run her own restaurant, and the place was finally booming with business. Ginny's mother, Molly Weasley, loved to help her daughter at the restaurant- mainly she watched her year-old twin grandchildren, though cooking was no problem either.  
  
One Saturday afternoon, Ginny was bringing one very picky customer's order when a woman close to her age came in and chose a small table by the window. Ginny glanced at the woman and noticed the familiarity of her. She smiled- she hadn't seen her friend in a long time.  
  
She gave the man his order and ignored the way he turned his nose up at it before walking over to her newest customer.  
  
"Hello, Hermione!" she said happily. "What would you like to drink?"  
  
Hermione's head shot up, and Ginny saw the shocked expression on her face.  
  
"Ginny!" she exclaimed. "You're working here?"  
  
Ginny laughed and said, "I not only work here, Hermione. Do you think I would've stooped that low after living a life with hand-me-downs? I own my business."  
  
Hermione stood up and hugged her friend.  
  
"But this business of yours doesn't pay *that* well, does it?" Hermione asked.  
  
"Oh, you'd be surprised," Ginny told her as the two sat down. "We get all sorts of people in here from all over the country. Some come here every day."  
  
"And Harry? What does he do?"  
  
"He's still an Auror. He was a little reluctant at first to start this restaurant- he didn't want to have to worry about this, too, what with the children and his job. But I finally got him to give in!"  
  
They laughed.  
  
"What about you, Hermione?" Ginny asked. "It's been four years, and the last time we heard from you, you were living in Tokyo. Then we stopped getting your owls, and we got worried. What happened?"  
  
Hermione sighed. She had been waiting for this question.  
  
"Waitress!" the rude man at the other table yelled. "I would like some service today, please!"  
Ginny sighed this time and went to speak with the man after telling her friend that she would be right back in a little while.  
***  
Hermione settled into her seat and looked around. This place was a little small, though she was sure the walls had probably been lined with magic at some time or other.  
  
She hadn't even imagined that she would bump into any of her childhood friends. No, they had been far from her mind. She found herself almost drifting off to sleep. She had to hand it to the Potters- this place was very comfortable and relaxing.  
  
It had gotten pretty dark outside, considering it was well past 7 o'clock at night, and the only light in the restaurant was from the single glowing candle on each table. Hermione stuck her finger in the melting wax as she waited for Ginny to return.  
  
Then, all of a sudden, she felt a pair of eyes as dark as tunnels staring at her.  
  
She looked up and, sitting at the table a few feet in front of hers, there was a tall man in dark clothing. Or were his clothes actually black? She couldn't tell in the bad lighting; he seemed to fade right into the darkness, and she felt chills run down her spine. How long had he been watching her?  
  
"Maybe if I ignore him, he'll turn away," she thought to herself as she looked out the window. She watched a couple walk by slowly. They looked like they were enjoying themselves. She wished silently that she could have that much fun.  
  
Being the head of all her classes at Hogwarts really took a toll on her social life. By the time she graduated at 17 years of age (18, if you count that extra year added in her third year), she had realized that many of her classmates liked to enjoy themselves in one year at more parties than she'd ever been to in her life. She managed to keep very close friends, such as Harry, Ron, Ginny, and Neville, but she still felt as though she had somehow missed out on a lot, no matter how good her grades were.  
  
She sighed inwardly. If only she'd been more sociable!  
  
Now here she was at age 30 sitting alone in her old friend's successful restaurant. Hermione didn't even have a job. It's funny that she, the one everyone would have bet their lives on her becoming the most important woman in the world, was filing for bankruptcy!  
  
She looked up, but she realized she had forgotten about the figure sitting at the other table. He watched her every move and got up from his seat. He was moving toward her….  
  
"Oh no!" she thought as she groped for her wand. She wasn't taking any chances.  
  
Soon he stopped in front of her table, and she could tell he was studying her. What did he want?  
  
"Hello, Ms. Granger," his silky voice whispered out smoothly. There was something strangely familiar about that voice, she noticed. Then it hit her… hard. She smacked herself a little too roughly on the forehead.  
  
"Professor Snape?" she asked, astounded as she was.  
  
He stepped into the light and she saw that he was indeed her former Potions professor. She instructed him to sit down across from her as she got over her short period of shock.  
  
"Why are you so surprised to see me?" he asked sarcastically as he sat down. "I think that I should be the surprised one."  
  
She glared at him. "What exactly do you mean by that?"  
  
He smiled, and it wasn't accompanied by his usual hate toward her. She couldn't help thinking that he looked rather nice for the sinister man he was.  
  
"You disappeared mysteriously, Ms. Granger. Several people were worried sick." He leaned toward her and lowered his voice. "I must admit that I, too, was worried."  
  
She frowned. Was she hearing right? She decided it would be rude to ask if he was crazy, even if he had hated her and her friends, so she took a more subtle approach.  
  
"Is that so?"  
  
He looked her straight in the eye, which made her very uncomfortable. The candle's flame cast shadows across his face, and it gave him an even more eerie look. She looked down at her hands.  
  
"Why do you not look me in the eye?" he asked, his deep voice sounding almost cheery. He also sounded like he was smiling. "I don't bite."  
  
She looked up at him. He was definitely acting out of character! Her thoughts must've shown on her face because his smile broadened.  
  
"That is, I don't bite… hard," he added slowly, stressing the last word.  
  
She felt goose flesh rising on her arms, but she couldn't help finding what he had said somewhat funny.  
  
"You do know that Harry, Ron, and I used to think you were a vampire, right?" asked Hermione. "For a little while, that is."  
  
"There have been made many false accusations of me, but I don't try to correct a single one." He looked around to make sure no one was looking before whispering, "To tell you the truth, I somewhat like these falsehoods. They just add more mystery to my disposition."  
  
As he was talking, she had leaned forward to hear his every word. He seemed to have some magnetism to him when it came to his mysteriousness.  
  
"You mean to tell me that you like being called a vampire or anything along those lines? Even an overgrown bat?"  
  
He sighed. "It's better than what I really am."  
  
She couldn't help feeling sorry for him. Only a handful of people knew that he had been a Death Eater several years ago. Even after Voldemort had been defeated and the Dark Mark and Harry's scar had disappeared forever, it still had left scars deep within him that would never go away: the scars of guilt for killing innocent people. If only there were something she could do for him.  
  
"What happened to you four years ago, Hermione?"  
  
His words made her snap back into a reality that she didn't even know she had left. What had he asked her? And what was the name he had used?  
  
"Come again?" she stammered.  
  
"I said, what happened to you four years ago, Hermione? It's a simple question, really."  
  
Hermione? He'd never called her that before!  
  
"W-what do you mean by that, Professor?" she managed to ask him.  
  
"Don't tell me that your around-the-world journey has robbed you of your intellect!" he hissed. "I'm not playing games, Ms. Granger. You know what I mean!"  
  
This time she was very uncomfortable. He had replaced his almost gentle tone of voice with the one he would use for students such as Neville Longbottom. It wa barely more than a whisper, but he still had the gift of making a person hang on to his every syllable, even if it was meant to cause fear. It made her sick to her stomach to hear him speak to her like that.  
  
But her Gryffindor bravery was too proud to let him manipulate her.  
  
"I believe that whatever happens in my personal life is really none of your business," she stated firmly. She made an exclamation of dissatisfaction in the back of her throat and leaned back with her arms crossed. This position clearly said that her mind was made up. She wasn't speaking to him unless she got an apology!  
  
He leaned forward, and she turned to face him. She immediately felt herself being sucked into the deep abyss of his eyes, and she couldn't get out. She heard his deep voice hissing from far away.  
  
"I don't like your attitude, Ms. Granger. My only regret is that you are no longer my student and I cannot take points away from you. Either you give me the respect I deserve, or I shall be forced to embarrass you!"  
  
"Ha!" she nearly yelled as she snapped out of it. "You have nothing to embarrass me with!" So much for the silent treatment, but there was no way he would get the better of her!  
  
"You don't believe me?" he asked with a false air of shock.  
  
"Give me a reason to, and I will."  
  
He smiled- a smile that sent a shiver running fervently down her spine. His smiles were somewhat arousing, and she felt an extreme heat welling up inside of her.  
  
But what had he in store for her? Could he possibly have dug up dirt on her and was about to use it to his advantage? She racked her brain for something extremely embarrassing that had happened to her in the past, but she couldn't think of a single thing at the moment.  
  
Then something struck her as being odd. Why was he so determined to find out what had happened to her? Was it possible for him to know? She gasped.  
  
Oh no. Professor Severus Snape knew everything.  
***  
She gasped. I knew exactly what had happened to her to make her "disappear" like that. I couldn't help myself. She was the only student in my entire teaching career who could answer all my questions correctly without hesitation. You had to have respect for someone with such a brilliant mind. There was a time when I thought it had even surpassed my own, but I realized that someone twenty-five years younger than me could never have all the experiences I had had. Unless, of course, she went crazy with her Time Turner. One could only imagine.  
  
I also thought she was the loveliest person I had ever had the privilege to meet. Contrary to popular belief, I was still a man, which also meant I had animal instincts, and I needed to go after what, in my mind, was rightfully mine. I had, after all, taught her everything she knew about Potions, and I had also dived deeper into her personal life than even she knew.  
  
She started sputtering nonsense. I couldn't even tell what she was saying. I smirked at her, trying to look smug enough to make her break down and tell me everything I wanted to hear. I would even make her cry if I had to. But just as I thought my plan was working, she picked up her purse and started walking to the door.  
  
"What?" I hissed, startled. She wasn't getting away that easily.  
***  
I was almost to the door when I felt a hand on my shoulder. Why couldn't he just leave me alone? And then he asked me a question.  
  
"It's a full moon tonight, isn't it?"  
  
I turned around to look at him, and I almost bumped noses with him. I couldn't take my eyes from his again.  
  
"Right," he whispered. "There's something I want to show you."  
  
"What is it?" I asked as he opened the door and led me out. I felt bad about not saying good-bye to Ginny, but I couldn't exactly get out of his grasp. He was stronger than I would have ever imagined, especially since he was concealed under all those robes.  
  
"Guess," he ordered me.  
  
"Are you going to throw me in a cell with a werewolf?" Although it wouldn't have been bad if it were Remus Lupin.  
  
He laughed. "No."  
  
"Um, you were lying to me about not being a vampire?"  
  
"What? No!"  
  
"Oh, I know!" I was starting to really get into this 'game' of ours. "You have one of those rare exotic flowers that opens at midnight only under a full moon. I should have guessed."  
  
"You are wrong yet again. For someone who claims to be smart, you sure aren't acting like it."  
  
That was when I lost interest in the 'game'.  
  
"You have a lot of nerve!" I yelled. A few people stopped to gawk at us. I lowered my voice. "It's not like you're helping me by giving me hints! What, do you know about a field of Mooncalves?"  
  
He turned to look at me.  
  
"Precisely." He took my shocked hand and walked even faster down the street. The only thing I could do was jog alongside him.  
  
"Professor, must we go so quickly?"  
  
"Call me Severus," he told me without even a single flutter of the eye, "and I want to get there before they start."  
  
We must have walked like that for another five minutes, darting down many different streets and alleyways, dodging between people- we almost ran into a drunken man even. Professor Snape- no, his name's Severus- didn't even bother to apologize as we sped past him. I gripped Severus' hand even tighter so as not to lose him. My feet were just starting to kill me when, the next thing I knew, we were standing on the edge of a large wheat field.  
  
"Has this always been here, Severus?" I asked, letting his name roll off my tongue and liking the sound of it.  
  
He held my hand even tighter and pulled me closer as I felt his other arm on my shoulder. There was something oddly customary about that, only I couldn't quite put my finger on it.  
  
"Only when you want to see it, Hermione," he drawled. "And only if it wants to be seen."  
  
Despite all of my claims of knowing practically everything, I didn't know much about Mooncalves. I had always wanted to see one dance, and it looked like my wish was about to come true. Then a thought hit me.  
  
"How will we ever be able to see them?" I asked him. "The wheat is too high."  
  
"That's where these come in," and he conjured up a pair of broomsticks, handing one of them to me.  
  
I am not the best flier in the world, and seeing Severus on a broomstick was something entirely new to me, even if he *did* referee one of our Quidditch matches. This wasn't how I would have imagined this night.  
  
But when I flew into the air, I found that the broom was extremely comfortable and fit me to my liking. I had to admit that he was good at this. I turned to tell him my claims, but all he did was point out into the middle of the field. I followed his gaze, and something large and grey was moving around in the wheat, trampling the plants down noiselessly with its enormous feet. I gasped. A Mooncalf.  
  
Despite the Muggle word, mooncalf, these creatures are brilliant compared to other magical beasts. They are capable of performing complicated dances that cannot be copied. To me, that's impressive, and I was in complete awe over the sight of him down below me. I could just barely make out the shape of his smooth body, his bulging eyes on the top of his head, and his four spindly legs sprawled out as they steadied their owner. This was a once-in-a-lifetime chance, and I was grateful for it.  
  
I stopped. Yet another feeling of déjà vu came over me. This felt strangely familiar. I looked over at my partner for the night and noticed him staring at me. And he wouldn't look away.  
***  
The beast had just started to clear away some of the wheat when I looked over at her. The moonlight hit her face exactly as I wanted to see it; her creamy, pale skin made her look radiant and her dark, wavy hair framed her face in just a way to make it look well rounded. That's the way she looked that last night I had seen her all those years ago in this exact same spot. If only she could remember.  
  
Then I noticed that she was looking back at me, and I felt beads of sweat forming on my forehead. I didn't mean for that to happen! But I found that I couldn't look away from her, and I felt an extraordinary magnetism toward her. If only she knew what she did to me!  
  
"Severus," she said calmly, though I could feel the fear and frustration in her voice, "what is the meaning of this?"  
  
The Mooncalf, having heard her, looked up at us and, frightened, scrambled back into its burrow. I couldn't blame it- I wouldn't want to witness the fight that was about to ensue, either.  
  
"Look at what you did!" I snarled at her. "You just ruined a perfectly good mating night for one of the most substantial creatures on this planet. I hope you're happy, Ms. Granger!"  
  
"You can't blame all of this on me!" she shot back. "I couldn't help it if you were sitting there staring at me the way you were! I got nervous."  
  
I turned my back to her. Why did I feel so guilty all of a sudden? I couldn't have made her nervous. After all, she was the one who had….  
  
No. I couldn't think about that right now. Not when the thing I needed most of all at the moment was a clear mind. The last thing I wanted was a guilty conscience lurking over my head.  
  
I landed gracefully, if I do say so myself, back on the ground and started to walk away. I thought about summoning the other broom back while she was still on it, but even though she was a pain in the arse, I didn't want to hurt her. A mind is a terrible thing to waste, and falling from a thirty- or forty-foot height is most effective.  
  
The next thing I knew, I was being pushed down onto the ground from behind. Hermione had nonetheless tackled me, and now we were wrestling in the dirt and grass, with me trying to get up and her trying to hold me down. I felt for my wand, but it was nowhere to be found. Then I saw it- how did Hermione get hold of it? I made a grab for it, but she just pulled it further from my reach.  
  
"Give me my wand!" I snarled. I made another grab and missed once again.  
  
"No! Not until you explain to me what the hell is going on, Severus." She emphasized her words by jabbing me in the chest with a wand- my wand, to boot. I sighed. If that was the way she was going to play, then so be it.  
  
"Hermione, I don't know what you're talking about."  
  
"You know very well what I'm talking about, you fool!" She dug her nails into my wrists. "Answer me!"  
  
"All right!" I told her, wincing at the pain. "But first you have to let go of me."  
  
She glared at me with those beautiful cinnamon-colored eyes of hers. I resisted the temptation of smiling and getting lost in them- I needed to keep my usual façade.  
  
"I'll let go of you when I've heard all I need to hear," she advised me. "Until then, you're just going to have to suffer." And with that said, she dug her nails in even further.  
  
Holding back the tears that were forming in my eyes from the slight pain in my sensitive wrists, I gave her my best "serious face", as I liked to call it. Unfortunately, Hermione wasn't the least bit amused.  
  
"You don't remember anything, Hermione!" I told her, almost pleadingly. I mentally kicked myself for sounding so desperate. "You had a Memory Charm put on you. That is why you must give me back my wand so I can perform the countercurse."  
  
"Do you think I'm a berk?" she retorted, her voice quivering too much to sound brave. "Just… try to explain to me what happened! I need to know."  
  
I saw a tear glisten as it slid unwanted down her soft cheek, and I almost let one of my own escape. Fortunately, I controlled my emotions enough to begin to explain the best I could what it was she felt compelled to know.  
  
"Hermione…" I began, but the words wouldn't come. My throat had tightened up so much that I couldn't speak. Was this some kind of magic? No, I realized. I was afraid of what she would think. *Severus*, I though to myself, *you* are *a shallow fool.*  
  
"Tell me!" she demanded once again. I became enraged- she should've been the one on the receiving end, not me.  
  
"Fine," I whispered in my deadliest and silkiest voice. "*I* did it, Hermione, and you knew it all along!"  
***  
I had been waiting for him to say those words. Then why did I start crying like a blubbering dolt? My mind crept back to the time I went on my voyage, back before I found out I was three weeks pregnant. I remembered in full detail the miscarriage I experienced the exact same night I was enlightened of that pregnancy. The witch doctor I had gone to see told me it would've been a girl. My baby girl, never given the chance to live, was gone without me even knowing of her presence. The same girl that also belonged to Severus Snape.  
  
Then there was the long period of depression from which I had suffered. It seemed as if it would never end, and as I lay there on top of him, clutching his arms half for support and half because of my anger whilst bawling my eyes out, I understood that I had not yet won- the battle had just barely begun. I heard Severus speak, but he sounded so far away. Then I finally heard.  
  
"Please don't cry, love."  
  
I opened my eyes. I hadn't even known that I had closed them. Who was he to get me pregnant? Who was he to put a Memory Charm on me and then leave me alone with a child my body couldn't even handle? When I had woken up the next morning all those years ago, I thought I had just been drunk the night before. I never thought about *this*. He was a bastard, and I wanted him to pay, so I started beating on his chest and I dug my nails even further into his already bloodied skin.  
  
"Hermione, stop!" he ordered me. I did stop, but only because I was fast becoming exhausted. I felt like I needed a Butterbeer- the alcoholic kind.  
  
"Listen to me, Hermione. I had a good reason for my actions."  
  
"Then what were they?" I bellowed with a voice that scared the both of us. I watched as he took a deep breath before speaking again.  
  
"You must understand that a guy like me, one that never gets out of the dungeons, so to speak, could never handle his actions, no matter how wrong they are," he whispered. "You and I were alone, in this exact same spot, and I couldn't help but notice your beauty and brilliant mind. I had not completely ignored you when you were my student. I don't know how to explain this- you gave me a certain kind of energy that nothing before has ever matched. I fell in love with you, Hermione, and I still love you."  
  
I never thought that sinister, foreboding Severus Snape, Master of Potions, could say such words. And I, I never knew that someone could feel that way about bookwormy, bushy-haired Hermione Granger. Needless to say, he had caught me unexpected, and I felt my breathing increase. The only other person who'd ever told me they loved me was Viktor Krum, and I didn't even offer those same feelings back. But we were so young, and we were so uncomfortable together. I had to break it off, even if he was reluctant to end our romance.  
  
Why was I being so cautious with everyone that claimed to love me? Obviously I needed somebody to talk to about my growing worries, such as my hesitation on finding a job that suited me. Why couldn't I just settle down with Severus, then?  
  
Because he had screwed me over- quite literally. No matter about that, I still felt something toward him that was stronger than my lingering doubts. I was a thirty-year-old woman and still unmarried, I had a four-year-old child that was never born, and now a fifty-five-year old man was claiming to be the father of that child.  
  
*Hermione, not every man would be so honest.*  
  
I looked back into those deep tunnels he called eyes and braced myself for what was to come next.  
***  
I could tell she was having conflicted thoughts by the way her face was twisted up. There was one thing I needed to do, and I couldn't hold back much longer.  
  
I watched with bated breath as she opened her mouth to speak, but I quickly stopped her.  
  
"There's something I have to tell you," I lied.  
  
She gaped openmouthed at me. "What is it?"  
  
This was it, Severus. Don't screw up.  
  
"Come closer." I watched as she obediently moved her head closer to mine and waited patiently for what I had to say. But I never said anything.  
  
I gazed longingly into her large and beautiful eyes. How could I have ever forgotten what they looked like? I'm sure Ronald Weasley or Viktor Krum would have been jealous to see me now. But their loss was my gain.  
  
With her lips only centimeters from mine, I reached up and easily kissed her. I waited, almost reassured, for her to pull back or hex me, but neither happened. That startled me- I had been so sure that she would detest my action. As we pulled away from each other, her eyes were tightly shut. My stomach lurched. Maybe it hadn't exactly pleased her after all.  
  
"You could have cursed me if you wanted," I said. Slowly she opened her eyes, one at a time, and let out a leaden sigh.  
  
"I know," was all she said before she passed out on top of me.  
***  
I remember waking up to the sound of voices murmuring. Who was talking, and where was I? I slowly opened my eyes to find the room dark and damp. This was getting too weird- this wasn't my bedroom! I reached up to rub my eyes, just in case I was seeing things, and I felt the perspiration on my forehead. If the room was so cold, then why was I so warm?  
  
I sat up and looked around at the unfamiliar room and noticed a crystal bowl filled to the brim with my favorite Muggle candies, M&M's, on the bedside table. This was even stranger because the room seemed to belong to a witch or wizard. Wait a minute- a wizard?  
  
I remembered Severus and how he had kissed me. How I had been so foolish then! I had actually enjoyed the kiss, but that exact same thought revolted me. Severus Snape? How I loathed him, and yet, how I loved him! He had a certain, inexplicable way of making someone feel as if contradicting thought are knocking him or her around. Oh, why did he have to be so hard of a man to understand?  
  
Something crashing in the room next to the one I was in caused me to snap from my reverie. What was going on, and, once again, where was I? I couldn't be in the dungeons of Hogwarts, could I? My stomach did an uneasy turn- my gut feeling was never wrong. Severus had collected me up last night and, not knowing where I was staying, took me back to his place of residence. It was a nice enough gesture, but couldn't he have at least given me the liberty of waiting here with me until I woke up? That's when I remembered what time of year it was. He had classes to teach.  
  
As I heard the yelling in the other room commence (no doubt a student had broken something and Severus was going in for the kill), I briskly grabbed a handful of M&M's and popped them into my mouth. The taste of the sweet chocolate quickly relieved me of the stress I was so strongly feeling at that moment, and I tried sitting up. Immediately I felt a dizzying headache squeezing my forehead, and I lay back down on the bed. He should have taken me to the infirmary, but no, stubborn Snape "won't have any of that nonsense."  
  
As I grabbed yet another handful of the candies, I wondered why they were there in the first place. I couldn't imagine him eating them so much that he needed such a large stash of them by his side every morning. In fact, I doubted he'd ever even tasted them before. I told myself not to worry about such petty things.  
  
I remembered something about Dementors in the Hogwarts library several years ago. The best cure after a run-in with one of them was a large helping of chocolate. The closest relative of Dementors is depression. Why hadn't I ever thought of eating chocolate to cure myself of this disease before? *Really, Hermione, maybe that trip of yours did do something to your brain!*  
  
As I was pondering this, the door suddenly burst open. In walked Severus, and he looked angrier than I'd ever seen him before. He looked over at me and noticed I was awake.  
  
"Can you believe those… *brainless gits* that I have to teach?" He brought a chair over to the bed and sat down on it. "How are you feeling this morning?"  
  
"It's only morning?" I moaned. "I need more sleep" I rolled over in an attempt to make him leave me alone, but it didn't work. He just came over and sat down at the other side of the bed.  
  
"How are you feeling?" he asked again, but slowly this time. "That's the last time I'm asking you that."  
  
I sighed. "I have a splitting headache, and the fact that I'm *here* does nothing to calm me! There, are you satisfied?"  
  
He thought for a second. "Yes, I'm quite satisfied, but you're not leaving."  
  
"When is your next class?" I asked, maybe a bit too cheerfully at the thought of him leaving again.  
  
"Not for another hour." He grinned merrily. "We have all that time to talk."  
  
Great. That's exactly what I wanted. I looked at him and wondered what exactly he wanted from me. My thoughts must have shown on my face because he pulled out his wand and moved closer to me.  
  
"What are you going to do to me?" I asked, my voice wavering. He was making me feel uneasy.  
  
"Don't you want me to reverse that Memory Charm that was put on you? Because if you don't, I could gladly release you out into the world just as you are at this moment with no recollection of why you were here in the first place," he aid as serious as anyone could be.  
  
I gasped. "You can't put *two* Memory Charms on me! That's barbaric!"  
  
His grin widened. "Exactly. Are you going to compromise with me?"  
  
I looked at his wand and then back at him and realized that "compromising" was my best bet.  
  
"Yes," I said. "Reverse that charm."  
  
"Remember, you might be surprised by all the memories you receive."  
  
He raised his wand, and I waited patiently for the great burst of energy I would soon be feeling.  
***  
Hermione had just walked through the threshold of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry when someone came up alongside her.  
  
"Harry!" she exclaimed as they walked together toward Dumbledore's office. "You're here too?"  
  
He grinned at one of his best friends. They had just seen each other a few days ago, yet she acted like it was a rare encounter.  
  
"Nice to see you too, Hermione." He reached into the pocket of his robes and handed her a letter. "I was supposed to send this to you by owl, but you know me! I heard you were coming here and couldn't resist giving it to you in person. It's a thank-you for coming to Ginny's and my wedding. You don't know how delighted we were to have you and your parents there!"  
  
She grinned and grabbed the letter from his outstretched hand. "There's no need to thank us, Harry. You knew we would've come even if you hadn't invited us!"  
  
"That's reassuring! I can't wait to see you show up for Ginny's baby shower."  
  
Her smile turned into a frown. "What baby shower?"  
  
"Got you there, didn't I?" said Harry. He ducked just in time to miss the back of Hermione's hand.  
  
"So, what does it feel like to be married? I always thought I would be the first of you, Ron and me to get married, but apparently, for once in my life, I was wrong!"  
  
"Hermione, you're full of yourself," Harry said, laughing along with her. It felt good to joke around with his friend, considering what was about to undertake.  
  
They had barely reached the gargoyle guarding the entrance to Dumbledore's office when it opened before them and out emerged Severus Snape, Potions master of Hogwarts and one very cruel person.  
  
"So, you two have finally decided to grace us with your presence," he sneered at them. "Follow me."  
  
Ignoring his rude and snide remark, they followed him up the twisting escalator-like staircase and into the aforementioned room. It hadn't changed much since the last time either of them had been in there, even the way Dumbledore was sitting in his chair, looking regal as ever. Hermione couldn't help wondering if the room seemed out of balance when he wasn't there. Maybe she would ask Harry sometime.  
  
"So nice of you two to finally grace us with your presence," Dumbledore stated with a twinkle in his eye. Snape glared at him but thought better of saying anything. After all, this was supposed to be a serious meeting. He still couldn't believe what he was being forced to undergo.  
  
"There are a few things I want to go over with you, Ms. Granger, that Mr. Potter here already knows. In fact," he said, turning to Harry, "I believe the reason you're here is to speak with me about an entirely different matter. I'm happy to have been invited and had been able to go to your wedding."  
  
Hermione suppressed a giggle as she watched Snape look bewildered at Dumbledore and Harry. He hadn't known of any such engagement. She couldn't help feeling a pang of sympathy toward him, however. Maybe Harry *should* have invited him. After all, he was on their side.  
  
"Please, everyone, take a seat," Dumbledore ordered. "You're making me feel inferior for some reason."  
  
Hermione watched as the elderly wizard drew forward three winged armchairs for them to sit in. She ensconced herself in the middle one and focused her attention back on the Headmaster, awaiting whatever it was he had to say; she knew that whatever it was, it must be very important. Otherwise, he wouldn't be acting so sincerely.  
  
"Let' cut straight to the chase," he finally said as he turned his blue eyes to focus on hers. "I don't like to keep others waiting, just as much as others don't like to wait." He realized he actually was stalling her before saying, "Hermione, you are in great peril."  
  
Hermione just held his gaze. She already knew this. She nodded to let him know that.  
  
"Ah," the wise old wizard continued, "but how great your danger is, you do not know. Voldemort has named you as one of his main target, and we cannot afford to lose you!" He gave her one of his warmest smiles. "You would be greatly missed."  
  
Hermione blushed. She knew she wasn't as important as he made her out to be, and it was even more embarrassing that he was saying this in front of Harry and Snape. She tried hard not to look at either of them.  
  
"You already know that the reasons he wants to get at you are because, for one, you are Muggle-born, and two, you're Mr. Potter's close friend-the two things he hates the most in a person. I have decided, although it's without permission from the Ministry, that Harry's closest friends and family members," Harry blushed at those last two words, "need extra protection. Therefore, I am sending you away."  
  
Hermione nearly gasped. Sending her away?  
  
"But, Professor," she said, her voice barely above a whisper, "I can't just leave here! Where am I to go?"  
  
"Anywhere you want to- as long as it's far away from here."  
  
Hermione's mind went reeling. Leave here… or face dying? She immediately chose the latter. No way could she just leave her family! Suppose Voldemort went after them, too? They would need someone like Hermione to protect them.  
  
"I'm sorry, sir. I just can't do it. My family!"  
  
Dumbledore sighed. He couldn't force her to go, after all. She would just put up a great fight.  
  
"Very well, Hermione. You can stay."  
***  
After being invited by Dumbledore to have a small feast before leaving Hogwarts, Hermione walked with Harry to the elf-filled kitchens in silence. She was very comfortable at the moment walking the familiar paths of the castle, but she still couldn't keep her thought off of Dumbledore's words. She was a Muggle-born and one of Harry's closest friends- the two things Voldemort hated the most in a person. Did she get an unlucky draw when she was born or what!  
  
But she didn't feel very unlucky. In fact, she didn't know how to feel. Even though she wasn't in a very good position at the moment, at least she wasn't being forced to pack up and move. Dumbledore was one of the fairest people she'd ever met.  
  
Harry had been watching Hermione out of the corner of his eye, watching her think, for a while now. She had always been a great thinker, but never before had she ever had to face prospects such as these. Thoughts must have been swarming around in that head of hers. He felt sorry for her- he knew how hard it would be to leave the place he had grown to love. But it was for the best, and she had to go.  
  
"Hermione, are you absolutely sure this is what yo want?" he asked her. She looked at him slowly with a somewhat pained expression.  
  
"Positive," she said before tickling the pear in the portrait and stepping inside the passageway. Harry noted that she even sounded certain.  
  
*So, it's going to be the hard way, is it?* Harry thought to himself before stepping through behind her.  
***  
Meanwhile, Snape was still sitting in Dumbledore's office, completely silent. Dumbledore thought it best not to disturb him from his thoughts, so he stood near the window, looking out at his beautiful view. He knew that when Severus was ready, he would come to him.  
  
"Albus," he finally spoke. "She'll be all right, won't she?"  
  
Dumbledore turned around slowly and faced the younger man. He was like the so he never had, and he would never even imagine putting him through something he didn't want to do. Hermione, also, was very precious to him. She had become one of the greatest friends the old man had ever had, and she was loyal and honest, too. Severus also had those traits- at least toward Dumbledore- when everyone else panicked. These two were nearly as crucially needed as Harry Potter was. Snape knew it as well, even if he didn't want to believe it himself.  
  
"She couldn't be any more safer than she soon will be. Believe me, Severus. When have I ever been wrong?"  
  
Snape could think of a few times when he had been wrong- or so it seemed- but he knew better than to say that out loud. He leaned back in his chair. If Dumbledore said he would have to do it, then there was no way he could change the old man's mind. Dumbledore was the most stubborn person he had ever met, unless you counted the Dark Lord. He winced- he didn't even want to think about what he would do when he found out their plans!  
  
"I trust you completely, Albus, but could you give me a few hours to… compose myself?"  
  
Dumbledore nodded and watched as Snape gradually stood up from his chair and turned to leave. But before he opened the door, he turned back to face Dumbledore.  
  
"Is there anything else I need to know before I try to… befriend… the witch?"  
  
Dumbledore smiled. "Not that I can think of, no."  
  
Snape forced a smile on his face and turned to leave, shutting the door quietly behind him. Dumbledore made sure Snape was out of hearing range and looked at Fawkes, his phoenix, who just cocked his head up at him.  
  
"The poor man doesn't know his own, sad feelings, Fawkes. Whatever shall we do with him?"  
  
Fawkes just let out one of his haunting cries and ruffled his red feathers. Dumbledore nodded- his phoenix knew best.  
***  
Snape rested his head on the cool stone wall of his room in the dungeons. In just a matter of minutes, he would begin to change the lives of so many people- the good and the bad. That was an amazing tour de force of which to think. Whenever he thought about it, he broke out into a great sweat, which was why he was in this position to begin with.  
  
*All right then,* he thought, *I just won't contemplate it.*  
  
He turned his attention to that new potion he was working on, which included adding the blood of a Mooncalf, when he realized he was thinking about her again. Part of his plan was to get her to help him with the potion, but how he was to do that, he wasn't sure. Maybe he had to threaten her with something of ghastly consequences?  
  
Right then- that's what he had to do. He lifted his head- his forehead now somewhat creased because of the wall's texture- and grabbed his heavy, black cloak. If he hesitated at all, it was for only a second before he raced out the door. He was a brave man after all.  
***  
Harry went on and on about his new life with Ginny and told Hermione of his fear. He was afraid his new wife would gradually lose interest in him. Hermione listened to everything he said, but it wasn't easy. Finally she cleared her throat, interrupting him from his saddened words.  
  
"Don't question your wife's judgment- look whom she married."  
  
Harry grinned, and his face turned the brightest shade of pink she'd ever seen it turn before. "Oh, shut up, Hermione."  
  
"Harry, I'm serious," she said, trying not to laugh at how timid he had suddenly become. "You're all she ever talked about for years before you even noticed her, and even after that it was tough to silence her." She turned towards him more and forced him to look her straight I the eyes. "You two were meant to be."  
  
Harry's grin just got even wider as he looked down at his food. Sometimes he could get so shy.  
  
"You know so much about how relationships should go," he said with a hint of admiration. "Why do you always try to stop the ones that happen to you?"  
  
She frowned.  
  
"There are more important things, Harry," she said harshly and took a large swig of her tea. Harry saw this as his cue to end that conversation. He couldn't help thinking of his best friend, Ron Weasley, however, and how he truly felt of their female friend. He would just have to get over the fact that she didn't like him that way.  
  
He glanced casually at Hermione and wondered what it was exactly she was waiting for. Not only was she one of the smartest people he knew but she was also endowed with good looks. She wasn't drop-dead gorgeous, of course, but she sometimes managed to make me do a double take. Maybe she wasn't as sure about the way she looked as her friends were. Well then, Harry decided he and Ginny would just have to change that. But right now they needed to get on with Dumbledore's plan.  
  
"Want to go for a walk?" he asked.  
  
Hermione looked up at him. He saw a short gleam of delight flash across her face before she changed it back to the face she was using lately- void of any feelings. She nodded and threw him a small smile and then waved at the house-elves, who tried to stuff cookies into their pockets.  
***  
Snape stood in the shadows of a Muggle department store as he watched the cars race by. He sneered at the noises and smells they made. Naturally, it would be like the Muggles to kill off their planet. How he loathed the silly things they did. But he kept telling himself over and over that Hermione was Muggle-born. *That poor girl,* he thought to himself.  
  
Then he saw two dark, cloaked figures race across the street as they dodged the Muggle contraptions. Horns went honking, and he knew exactly who the two were… and he didn't need to see the scar on the ma's forehead or the bushy hair of the woman. It was Harry and Hermione, and they were coming to the store, just as planned.  
  
"I need to pick up some floss," he heard Harry say as they neared. "Do you want to come in?"  
  
The two stepped into the light just in time for Snape to see Hermione shake her head. "I think I'm going to stay out here and breathe some… fresh air."  
  
Harry shrugged before walking inside. Snape smirked to himself. Fresh air his ass.  
  
She checked to see that she was alone before walking to the pop machines. Snape looked on in curiosity- he'd been wondering what those were, and it seemed as if he would soon find out. He stepped a little out of the shadows to get a closer look in time to see her push a few Muggle coins into a slot in the machine. *How very curious,* he thought to himself.  
  
Quickly, she pushed a button, and the machine made a loud clanking noise. She reached down and pulled out a can, pulled a tab on it, and started drinking whatever was inside.  
  
*So it's for refreshment!* He slowly stepped slightly more into the light as her back was turned. He took in the sight of her. He'd just seen her a few hours ago, but a few hours could change people a great deal. She was wearing her best robes- because of the meeting earlier- and her hair had been fussed over a bit. And he had gotten a good look at her face before. She was wearing makeup.  
  
All of a sudden, she turned and saw him standing there. She let out a silent shriek and dropped her drink. He could feel himself flinch for a second before retaining his foreboding posture.  
  
"Professor Snape!" she squeaked before clearing her throat. "You gave me a fright."  
  
He watched her blush and then looked down at her spilled drink. He decided now would be a good time for him to speak.  
  
"Sorry about that," he said. "I didn't realize I would have that kind of effect on you."  
She gazed up at him with her watery, cinnamon-colored eyes. She'd never heard him apologize before.  
  
"No problem," she spoke. "I guess I get a little jumpy these days."  
  
He threw her a smile and watched her eyes grow even wider. She'd never seen him do that before, either.  
  
Snape saw movement out of the corner of his eye and turned to look in at the store. There was Harry, standing a few feet from the doors holding a large paper bag in his hands. Floss indeed! That was when Snape realized what Harry was doing. He had quickly turned around and walked to the back of the store, his dark green cloak swishing (and receiving strange looks from the other customers). And even though Harry couldn't see him, Snape threw him a disgusted look.  
  
Hermione peeked around the door, trying to see what he was looking at. He had nearly forgotten she was there! He snapped his head back to face her, and she jumped, startled at his sudden movement.  
  
"Ms. Granger," he said to her as she moved wisps of hair from out of her face, "there is something with which I need your help, and I think you might benefit from it."  
  
"What is it?" she asked. She looked at him inquisitively and nodded her head as if to urge him on with what he had to say. If anything needed her help, she would be willing to lend that help, being the ever-curious and ever-learning person she was.  
  
"I'm not quite sure you could help me," he said, staring deep into her eyes. She squirmed under his emphatic gaze and her dark robes, wishing Harry would come back soon.  
  
"And how would you know I can't help you, Professor?" she asked. "You don't exactly know everything about me, sir!"  
  
"Why must you address me in that way, Hermione?" He grabbed her wrist and pushed her up against the machine. "Why must we act like total strangers to each other? I've known you since you were a little girl. I'd like to think I know at least *something* about you!"  
  
She looked down at his tight grip on her arm. His knuckles had turned completely white, and she was losing feeling in her hand. *Just go along with him and he won't become more violent….*  
  
"All right. It's all right." She repeated it. A trickle of sweat ran through her hair. "May I call you Severus?"  
  
"There is no law that prevents you from it," he said. "That's all I'm asking."  
  
She felt the feeling in her hand drain back in, like the sands from an hourglass that is turned upside down. He stepped back into the light, and she saw for the first time that night his bloodshot eyes. He had been drinking.  
  
"Follow me," he whispered. He looked back into the store and nodded. It was now safe for Harry to come back outside.  
***  
Hermione was afraid. No, not afraid. She was *terrified.* Severus was leading her through a seemingly never-ending maze, and she did not trust him at all. She wondered what his blood alcohol level was. Maybe he wasn't in his right mind?  
  
"After I show you my discovery, I'll invite you back to my dungeons for some blood pudding." He snaked his arm around her waist, and she nearly gagged at the thought of thickened swine's blood, but instead she looked up at him and pulled off a sincere smile.  
  
They must have walked like that for another five minutes, darting down many different streets and alleyways, dodging between people- they almost ran into a drunken man even. Snape didn't even stop to apologize as they sped past him. She gripped his hand even tighter so as not to lose him. Her feet were just starting to kill her when, the next thing she knew, they were standing on the edge of a large wheat field.  
  
"I never knew this was here before," she whispered up to him.  
  
"I'm surprised at you, Hermione," said Severus. "You're a witch after all. Have you never heard of a thing called 'magic'?" He smirked.  
  
Hermione didn't find his last remark the least bit funny, but she wasn't going to tell him that. She was too frightened to anger him any in fear of what he might do to her.  
  
"You've heard of Mooncalves before, correct?" He walked around her in circles, looking her up and down. She just stood there and tried not to gasp as she felt his pitch-black eyes roam her body.  
  
She answered him simply with, "Of course I have," her voice unwavering. "I would love to see one."  
  
"But what if you never did?" he asked. "Would seeing one change your life completely, or would it just be another marvelous interaction with the outside world for you?"  
  
She didn't know what to say. What did he mean by that? He was making about as much sense as Sibyll Trelawney in her views of the psychic world.  
  
"Well?" he asked impatiently. "Answer me now!"  
  
She jumped. How was she *supposed* to answer him?  
  
"I very much doubt my life would change any," she said in a small voice. "It's only a Mooncalf."  
  
He stopped his circle and looked at her back. His laughter rang all around them and she was sure someone would hear him and come to her rescue. They did not. A tear trickled down her cheek.  
  
"What does a Mooncalf have to do with anything?" she braved to ask. She could feel more of the hot stinging sensation in her eyes as they filled with even more salty tears. *Oh, God, what is he going to do to me?*  
  
"I'll tell you what I'm going to do to you," he said as she gasped. *He could read her thoughts.*  
  
He flipped her around to face him. She couldn't see his face, yet she could hear his thin, raspy breath.  
  
"Never- underestimate- me." He pointed a long finger behind her. "Look."  
  
She turned her head around and saw the heavily scented wheat field directly behind her. Something big was moving around in there.  
  
"When the farmers wake up in the morning," he whispered into her ear as she stared longingly at the movement, "they'll call family members, reporters, anyone they can find. They'll claim to have spotted crop circles. But no matter what they do, they can never get past an assembly of aged wizards." He slowly swiped his tongue across her earlobe.  
  
Hermione closed her eyes tightly, shutting out the sight of an old farmer's cruel fate.  
"Just imagine their demise, Hermione. No Muggle will ever get past the Ministry of Magic."  
  
"You're wrong." The words floated from the very back reaches of her mind, the long lost memories of her childhood, and the unforgivable curses of her adulthood.  
  
"You're wrong!" she screamed. A flock of crows and pigeons sprang out from the apple tree behind them and the Mooncalf lifted its grey head before quickly and silently pulling itself back into its burrow.  
  
Snape stood there without moving for the longest time, only his rasping breath indicating any sign of life. The dreadful look on his face gave her the impression of an old, tired man who had just seen his entire life flash before his eyes.  
  
"I'm so sorry!" she tried to say as sincerely as possible. "I never meant for that to happen." She stammered out a few other nonsense words, but she didn't understand them. The expression on Snape's face gave the same indication.  
  
"Go away," he said. He started walking toward the field but decided against it. Instead, he walked away in the other direction, giving her one last look as he left.  
  
"Severus," she whispered. "Severus! Where are you going?"  
  
He stopped midstep.  
  
"Somewhere you're not," he bellowed. He continued to walk; it was a slow, steady canter.  
  
If he had turned around, he would have seen the dark silhouette of a man creep up behind Hermione, with her tear-streaked face. However, he only heard her shocked, short cry.  
  
He winced, but he kept walking.  
***  
Hermione stared at her hands. So that's how it had all happened. Now she wished she had never known. Slowly, she lifted her eyes to his.  
  
"You were protecting me from that horrid memory. Now I feel just terrible for acting the way I did!"  
  
"Hermione," he whispered, "you shouldn't blame yourself. It is only human nature to be inquisitive. You would never have understood otherwise."  
  
He paused as he reached for her hand, wrapping her fingers in his. She didn't pull back. She needed the compassion at the moment.  
  
"It was an utterly treacherous thing for us to do to you. If there had been a better way to send you off to safety, I would gladly go back and do that- honest! But I can't. I'm sorry."  
  
She rubbed a tear from her cheek.  
  
"But I wanted to have a baby from natural causes, not from magical experiments and exploitations! Why did you take all the blame for this- tracking device they put in me? Why did you lead me to believe a lie? I wanted you to be the father!"  
  
He lifted his eyes from their hands and looked up at her shocked, flushed face. Obviously, she hadn't meant to say that to him, of all people.  
  
He traced his thumb along the side of her hand. How smooth her skin felt against his own callused hands.  
  
"Hermione, love," he began, "there is something of which I must tell you. First of all, make sure that you know what you are saying."  
  
Slowly and without a sound, she nodded, her wavy hair falling in untidy curls onto her shoulders. He smiled- a thing he couldn't help doing.  
  
"Second, I would do anything for you, and I need for you to know that." He took his other hand and lifted her chin. "Nothing would stop me from protecting you. I would kill just to ensure your safety."  
  
"Severus…."  
  
He took his index finger and placed it to her lips.  
  
"No," he whispered as he sat on the edge of the bed and moved closer to her. "Don't try to stop me. You know that I would."  
  
She gave him a meek smile as he removed his finger and began to stroke her cheek.  
  
"I love you, Hermione. With all of my troubled heart do I love you. The past four years, the only light that has filled the void of darkness that is my life was the thought of your presence, living somewhere out there where everyone knew you were safe. That was the only thought that kept me going on. I dreamt of the day you would return, and here you are. This meeting did not go as I had planned it, but it all turned out fine in the end. Hasn't it?"  
  
She couldn't help herself. She burst into tears and wrapped her arms around his neck. She had wanted to hear him say such words since the moment she heard his voice last night, though she hadn't known.  
  
Quickly her sobs subsided, and she placed her forehead against his. He wiped away the trickles of tears that had run down her face.  
  
"Don't worry anymore, my love," he told her, entangling his fingers in her hair. "No longer will you have to wonder what comes next in life. I will be here for you every step of the way. I am yours now, if you are willing to be mine." He looked deep into her eyes and smiled. "There wouldn't be a problem, now would there?"  
  
She giggled as she felt his hot breath on her lips.  
  
"I have no problem with any of that," she answered.  
  
He brought her closer to him as he made himself more comfortable on the bed. From that moment on, he knew he had found what happiness was meant to be. He saw a future for himself with this outspoken, intelligent, beautiful woman, and he knew that everything would fall into place.  
  
It had to. He felt it in his heart.  
  
He pressed his lips against hers. For the first time, their kiss truly meant something worthwhile. 


End file.
